October is almost over - and I'm glad

It has been a month of huge change, ups an downs. Catherine has had her little baby girl, and she is beautiful. Ava is a very healthy little girl, and I was lucky to be there to meet her just about an hour after she was born. I spent ten days with her, and John came for the last six days. It was a very intense time, full of changes, especially for Catherine and Paul. Catherine ended up having a hard time with breastfeeding, and with all the lack of sleep and hormonal changes, she went a little over the edge at times. It is hard to see that happen, and even though I know it will pass, I am sometimes worried about Catherine, who feels things to intensely. She has been so inside herself and it's hard for her to get out of the house. Paul is back to work today, so this will be the "real world" as she says. Paul's family left yesterday, so it will be her first time alone during the day. She may find that she can get in to the rhythm of life with a baby now. Once we get used to it, us moms tend to manage well. I hope Catherine will find this out too. We saw Jackson and his parents a few times too. Jackson is so cute and funny. We are looking forward to seeing him soon so that his parents can go down to Berkeley to find a place for them to live. This weekend was horrible. Alex ended up putting his car into a ditch. He had had a couple of beers a few hours earlier and even though he was not over the limit, the car was impounded. What a perfect storm of unhappiness! The reason he sped off late Friday night is because Sharah was not speaking to him and he wanted to see her. He told his dad this, and then went out. When John got the call to help Alex out, he went right down, and Sharah was there too. I wasn't there but it seems like the two of them really had it out. Both have very quick tempers. Alex is so upset with his dad that he has temporarily moved out. He came home yesterday to tell us that he loves us but still can't come home. He and Sharah had just ended things about half an hour earlier. There were lots of tears on Friday and I am worried about Alex's state of mind. I am going to try to find a counselor for all of us. Added to that, we didn't hear from Catherine all weekend. She had phoned on Friday, and there were tears and she was mad at her dad for giving Ava a cold - not a good way to end a conversation but I had to go to work. We heard that Heather had visited Catherine and Ava too - but she hasn't been in touch either. I feel isolated and right now I don't seem to have a lot of enthusiasm for anything. I guess that is understandable. To end this up and down month, John is going in for a colonoscopy tomorrow. He has to stop eating at noon and then take horrible stuff that will make him clear out his bowels in a very dramatic way. In a couple of days we should have a resolution to all of this. I hope and pray that the doctor will find nothing. I am going to work this morning. That is one thing I think I can still do, and I like being with the people at Deep Cove, staff and kids. It's raining again!!